I need to know more about Fractal theory...

There are times like this, when I feel good about working where I do...

Today while we were seeing a TV series about "Fractal theory" (fascinating stuff) I realized that the theory in its current state was first coined by Benoît Mandelbrot – an Ex-IBM T J Watson researcher. May be working there, someday some of the genius which surrounds me will rub off ??

Anyway, the fractal theory by itself amazing in its simplicity. The fact that it can give a mathematical structure to the randomness in nature, is rather spellbinding. Have to read more about this subject… better understand the explaination of the seemingly disordered world with such geometrical simplicity.

This is definately on my list of things to read about .................................

hmmm...

Ever wondered why endings are as important as the beginnings…..

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society : A Review

What a delight !!!!! I just got up after reading this book and I have to say that it was a one of those which leaves a smile lingering on your face long afterward.

Placed around World War II this book brings to life the horrors of the war time and the bravery of the people who lived through it. Set as a series of letter, between the narrator and the other characters, this book manages to be funny while tantalizing those "tear glands"

At the end of the book, I swear I feel like I personally know all the characters and the place "Guernsey Island". And the best part - I have that "rare" feeling of satisfaction at the "end", which is so rare with a book.

Often great books fall short of being really "great" due to the ending, but this one ... Nay! not this one.

On a day of leisure, where you want to curl up and pick a "feel good" book, choose this one... with a mug of coffee next to you, sipping away, drown yourself into these pages......... you will find yourself sighing, sniffling and smiling....

Geico woes- The GECKO experience

We are sorry to announce that our “first” Honda car will no longer be driven on the roads again! The scrap yard has claimed its last remains and we mourn our loss, while counting our blessings. No humans were injured but we lose money. This rather tragic accident happened courtesy some “youngster” who turned left when she was not supposed to and banged right into the car.

Shaken, but in working condition the human called his insurance company – Geico, in hopes that this “mess” would be sorted out soon. However, little did he know that the “youngster” having a Geico as well would delay the process by atleast two weeks. With a car sitting in tow yard and making calls everyday, filing claims and sending papers, frustration grew. GEICO – the friendly Gecko? BLAH!

After a dozen calls, the judgment was passed, “5%” fault on your end. Hmmm… how did Geico come with a “95%” “youngster’s fault” and “5%” ours, does it even make sense? A conflict of interest in a big suspect! Wonder if the analysis would have been the same had the “youngster” had a different insurance company. Now we pay to get the car towed back to our house, get the car scrapped and pay the person who hit into a car “5%” of her damages. And the car is valued at whole “3.5K” less than auto-trader value, which means we lose atleast “4.5K” in this accident, which was only “5 %” our fault.

Yeah! Indeed Geico knows how to deal fairly and indeed I shall recommend it to everyone (whom we don’t care too much about)!! YAY…

Yours truly (still getting over Geico blues)

Laptop - Busy look

Have you ever been in meetings where everyone is trying to do a couple of things the same time, balancing one delicate topic with other, trying to figure out answers simultaneously?

I find myself constantly at these kind of meetings, sometimes I am truly handling a few things together and sometimes I am just trying to look “Busy”. Is this attitude good? I dunno, but I do know makes me feel a little better when I am hunched up in front of laptop (like the rest of the crowd) typing away to glory while listening to another person talk.

My laptop has almost become compulsive habit. I go to my office, shrug my jacket off and open my laptop before heading out to do any actual work. The first hour in the morning is totally devoted to checking emails, replying to them and just getting into groove.

The ironical thing about this obsession of mine is that my work is not actually computer related. Of course, I just started on mask design and vending, but that just forms 20 % of my workload, but mostly I do not need to be near my laptop to work.

However, without checking my email every hour I feel completely disconnected (inspite of having an IP phone in my office), isolated, torn away from the known world. May be it comes from the fact that as soon as my office door closes, I am alone in the room facing the walls and the books? Or maybe it is just something all the engineers feel? Or perhaps it is just me, I constantly need someone to be around me (not talking really, but just be there around) and in office, it is my laptop which fills this void of mine!

Well, for most it is simpler to hunch up in front of laptop and the world thinks work is in works :)

Wondering/Wandering conscious!

As I sat watching “Blow” a movie about drugs and coke, I found myself wondering – “Does coke really have so much power? Wonder how it tastes” and then I was horrified by the way my thoughts went…. Is this how people are tempted, does wondering often lead to trails and then addiction?

I think not, it must definitely take more than just thought to just step forward and go ahead and do something which you have been told not to!!

How many times have we gone against our parents, done things forbidden and enjoyed every moment of it? I can count a few and to tell ya the truth I regret none. Well, perhaps the reason for such exists to the fact that my conscious talks to me all the time. It tells me “hey Aparna this is not right” and I try to listen to it (most of the times anyway), perhaps that’s what saved me from a thing like regret!

Well, conscious or not, the “forbidden” thoughts sometimes do sneak in .. and I find myself wondering……………. Yet again!

Snow Flower and Secret fan- thoughts

As I turned each page of “Snow flower and secret fan” I felt emotions welling up inside me. It was difficult not to associate with some characters in 19th century china. The foot-binding was a saga new to me and I found myself fascinated by the things done in name of beauty. The book describes in detail the procedure of foot-binding and your heart goes out to “third sister” whose cries for “mercy” and “ I won’t do it” are left unheard resulting to her eventual death. .

It is amazing how a woman is always the worst adversary of another woman. I cannot understand how a woman who has personally known the pain and hurt of foot binding, put her own daughter through the very same trails. Isn’t a mother supposed to be your sieve for all things painful in your life? Isn’t a mother supposed to nurse and protect her young one?

Life for a woman must have been an entirely different thing, her very existence depending on them having “sons”. A child bearing vassal is what she was in true terms. A woman’s world not her own but spun intricately around men’s, made to accommodate the desires of “their men”. Yes, indeed life was different!

But inspite of such trails, the same 19th century women find their own way of rebellion –Nu Shu, the women’s secret language. I thought it was in it’s own an attempt at making their own independence self-felt. The fact that Nu-Shu had nothing to do with men’s existence but everything to do with women’s itself describes the radical nature of it. The fact that woman were not allowed to “literate” themselves, yet choose their own way to do so… choose their way to speak with the rest of their kind.. away from the prying eyes of the world in general.. makes you realize that the oppressed are not truly so.. the caged birds always find a way to flutter !!!!

Another attempt at penning the thoughts.. I still write .........

I still write.. but mostly in my mind. There are times when I do open my laptop and decide to write those thoughts down, but before I can do that…….. I drift away to the yonder land of work or chat. Sometimes I almost wish I had that tape-recorder where I could record my thoughts to just pen them later on. I let my vanity at times dwell on those lines and imagine that “if only I had that” I would have made a great writer. Perhaps give a few authors run for the money ;).

Well, ambition is always been one of my greater vices.. I still haven’t done anything worthwhile, yet I would like to. I would like to someday be known well in the circles I work in, known as “ahh the smart gal”…. but mostly someone who is likable but yet successful. Can that every happen?? I dream a lot, and more often than not those dreams drive me and make me what I am perhaps.

This of course doesn’t mean that I don’t currently enjoy my life.. I do actually. I just switched jobs and at the moment I really like what I am doing….. I still am in love with the person I married, even though I burst into tears without reason and am the howler of the century ……….I think I am lucky to have him in my life. I do miss my home in India but hey looks like I have a home here as well now… yes life has been good to me (touchwood) and I am enjoying living it.

Perhaps in this contentment lies in my lethargy of writing on record.. perhaps I may get over it and finally start blogging regularly……………??